The PEDs to be Scrutinized

            So, who are the contenders for best PED (performance enhancing drink)?  Do any of them work?  After exhaustive research (a fifteen minute internet search), I narrowed the field to four drinks.  Each claims to improve performance.   I am referring to athletic performance, although a close source tells me at least one of these drinks may improve another type of “performance” as well.  The chosen drinks are Red Bull Energy, Gatorade G-series 01 Prime, Unbeetable, and coffee.  Why these drinks?  These are the only ones I could find which claim to enhance athletic performance.  Coffee, of course, is not marketed with this claim, but there has been more research regarding coffee’s impact on athletic performance than the rest of the contenders combined.

First up is the ubiquitous Red Bull Energy Drink.  According to the company’s web site, it will “give me wings.”   It is “fueled by a combination of caffeine, taurine, b-vitamins, sucrose, glucose, and alpine spring water. “  The web site is a virtual who’s who of professional athletes and daredevils who endorse Red Bull.  I am not planning on jumping out of a space craft, but I am looking forward to seeing what the Bull can do for me.  Or, maybe it is all just a bunch of bull . . . we will see.

Contender number two for best PED is a relative new kid on the block, Unbeetable.  Let me come clean right off the bat . . . I have a huge conflict of interest.  One of my closest friends recently brought Unbeetable to market.  Can I be more conflicted?   Yes:  I also hold 1% stake in the company, and my wife is a salesperson.  Will this bias me when I come to my analysis?  Probably.  Despite this conflict, I promise not to fudge any of my biking time trials, and I will attempt to remain truthful.  The scientist in me knows Unbeetable should not be included on this list, but the athlete in me cannot help but to give it a try.  Beetroot juice, the core ingredient of Unbeetable, is the rage in endurance sports. Any accomplished cyclist or runner is familiar with juicing beets.  During the 2012 Summer Olympics, athletes heavily used beetroot.  Why am I choosing Unbeetable and not a competitor beetroot drink?  First, I have 6,000 cans of Unbeetable in my garage, and second, I hate the taste of beets, but I am able to tolerate Unbeetable.  There you have it, my full, heavily biased disclosure.

The third contender is Gatorade G-series 01 Prime.  What ever happened to plain old Gatorade? I grew up in Gainesville, Florida, and take pride in the fact a local scientist invented Gatorade for the Florida Gators.  Now they just call it G.  What a crock.  Despite this injustice, it is hard to leave G off the list.  Of Gatorade’s many performance drinks, only G-series 01 Prime is marketed to be taken prior to exercise to enhance performance.  Go to the website and you can see the “science” behind the drink.  I will give it a try.  Go Gators!

Last, the universal pick-me up, coffee.  The only real question is whether I should drink my standard home brew, Trader Joe’s Dark, or Starbucks.  Trader Joe’s Dark it is.  I am not a Starbuck’s fan.  Coffee is chock full of anti-oxidants, it purportedly boosts athletic performance, and it tastes good. 

Let the competition begin.

Next week . . . tackling Elk Mountain.

(It is not too late to suggest additional contenders for #1 PED)